And Mt Shiretoko Rocked
by kakashidiot
Summary: Kyouya wakes up in a dark and forbidding land. What the heck? Hokkaido in the winter? Are you crazy, Tamaki. No. It's love. TamaKyou. RandR.


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**I do not own Ouran High School Host Club.**

_**My first Ouran Fic! Please be kind and constructively criticize.**_

_**This is a Tamaki/Kyouya!**_

_**If you don't like yaoi - or don't know what it is, check it out on Wikipedia. That place is the fount of all knowledge! Seriously! It's where I got all this info on Hokkaido!!! Yep! Most of the places mentioned here are FOR REAL! (probably not my description of them... but hey... artistic license...)**_

_**READ AND REVIEW!!!!!**_

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**And Mt. Shiretoko Rocked**

**TO GODDESSNEPTUNE!!!!**

"YAY!!! A hiking trip! Thank you, Kyouya! I love you! Yay! Yay! Hugs all around! Mon ami, j'adore!!!"

Kyouya, ignoring the warm arms now wrapped securely around his waist, handed over a wad of bills to their stoic, silent (obviously freaked out) guide. Before the paper froze over, the gruff older man, stowed the money away in his pocket, with a grunt.

"His attitude is so cold..." wept Tamaki, who wasn't enjoying the lack of attention. "Why can't we be all happy together on this adventure? Mommy! Did Daddy do something wrong?"

Kyouya merely shoved his frosted over glasses further up his nose - and wished, for the fiftieth time, that he'd worn contacts.

_

* * *

Although with this cold, even they could be dangerous... _

* * *

Glaring at his friend (something hard to do in a mini-blizzard), Kyouya wondered, yet again, why he put up with his friend's antics. 

"It's not my fault..." Tamaki pointed out sadly.

"No," Kyouya said, folding his arms, scary eyes switching on. "It was the TWINS."

_**

* * *

FIVE HOURS BEFORE: **_

Everybody knew two things: Tamaki had an insatiable appetite for Japanese culture - both high and low, old and new - which is why Kyouya had been his (forced) tour guide for the past two years.

Also:

Kyouya was the weakest in the early hours of the morning.

Combining those two facts of knowledge, the Twins, encouraged by a cheery (and naive) Honey, had set the whole thing up. Mori hadn't been able to voice any objections, since "Ahh..." seemed his favorite watchword, these days - and, as Haruhi chortled to herself -

"Serves them both right... those bastards..."

Which is how Tamaki had found himself shipped out, with a sleepy (therefore, vulnerable) Kyouya, on the Twin's private Cessna for a pre-arranged trip to Hokkaido. In the middle of winter.

_**

* * *

FIVE HOURS BEFORE: **_

_**(In the snug, warm, cozy, brightly lit Music room)**_

"Well," Kaoru shrugged. "Lord DID say he wanted to visit Hokkaido in the winter..."

"Ahh..." Mori nodded, remembering how ecstatic Tamaki had sounded when blissfully reading the tourist pamphlet.

"But summertime in Hokkaido is different than winter..." Haruhi pointed out.

"Yes, yes," Hikaru nodded. "We told him that. It wasn't our idea to make Kyouya go along... but, the Prince is right, Kyouya has been his tour guide since the beginning..."

"Really?" Haruhi blinked. "I had no idea..."

"Yeah... I think they're friendship really bonded in - was it, Kyoto?" Honey mused aloud, turning to Mori.

"Mmmmm..."

"I don't know... I've never been there," Kaoru sighed. "We should go, Haruhi..."

"It's too rainy... but, you know, it's hard to imagine Kyouya putting up with Tamaki all that time," Haruhi muttered to herself. "Truely, the Shadow King still remains mysterious..."

"They'll be fine," Hikaru flapped his hand. "I just hope they stick it out - or else this won't be fun at all..."

"Kyouya would figure something out," Haruhi said.

"Not without his wallet or cellphone..." Hikaru grinned tossing the objects up and down in the air.

"No WAY!" Haruhi sighed. "You guys are dead... I'm out of here..."

"Hey! Where are you going?"

"My belated Christmas shopping, that's what!"

"Let's go! Let's go! Shopping with Haruhi!"

"No - I didn't say you could come -"

"Let's get some Christmas treats! I LOVE SWEETS! AND FUDGE! AND BROWNIES! AND CAKE!"

"Hey..."

_**

* * *

FIVE HOURS BEFORE: **_

_**(In the frozen, empty, desolate, lonely, dark landscape)**_

"We're going home, NOW, Tamaki. If you want to stay here and freeze your ass off discovering Japanese culture in the middle of a snow storm, so be it. I'm out of here. Now..."

A pause.

"WHERE THE HELL IS MY CELL PHONE!!!! AND MY WALLET!!!!"

"Kyouya-kun! You're scary!!!"

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO?"

"It's not my fault! The twins set it up - a whole schedule and everything - which we... have... to... follow..."

Hell broke loose.

Kyouya stood there, huffing in the snow, watching with no small satisfaction as the million of white pieces of paper (their schedule and map) disappeared into the snow storm.

Tamaki huddled beside the monosyllabic guard, who had decided that, yes, all rich people from Tokyo WERE crazy.

_Stupid._

_Insane..._

_But mainly, stupid._

* * *

When Kyouya calmed down, Tamaki had been overjoyed - even though Kyouya was still fuming. Apparently, the envelope of money (which Tamaki hadn't given to Shredder!Kyouya) was filled with enough funds for them to enjoy themselves - but not to get home. 

"Damn... Well... let's get this over and done with..." Kyouya sighed, snuggling further into his parka. "The sooner this is over, the better."

He stomped off.

"Uh. It's over that way," pointed the guide, in the opposite direction.

Kyouya stiffened.

"Then start doing your job," he snapped.

"Sorry," Tamaki whispered, toward the guide. "But don't worry... He'll be fine."

"Least of my worries," the old man muttered to himself.

* * *

The snowstorm eventually settled - Tamaki's spirits rose with the sun and Kyouya - against his will - had to admire the beautiful landscape of the Shiretoko National Park - if a frozen world could be called beautiful. Trudging past the frozen Oshinkoshin Waterfalls - a picture of icy majesty, the equally frozen Five Lakes (a winter wonderland of snow - stark silences)... 

"It's too bad we'll miss the Kamuiwakka Falls," sighed Tamaki as he flipped through a guide that also popped out of the envelope. "It says here, that there's this hot spring pool that people can bathe in..."

"But to go in the summer," grunted the unsociable guide.

"Which makes we wonder why we are here NOW," Kyouya's frosted glasses glinted, he took them off and tried to wipe them off again.

"Crazy..."

Tamaki twisted around to look at his unhappy companions.

"But isn't this beautiful?"

"..."

"Sure," Kyouya trudged past him (stomping was hard to do in knee-deep drifts...). "It would be more beautiful if we were in a warm, comfy hotel."

"Ohhh... according to these two reservations... it looks like we got a room... at some sort of hostel..."

Kyouya glared at the idea of sharing a bed in a hostel.

"When I get back..."

"Kyouya! Wait up!"

"Get moving! I want to only spend one night on the trail!"

"But I'm the one carrying everything!"

"You're the one with MOST energy! You're the one who's fine getting up so early in the morning - and I've had no breakfast."

"Have a bar," offered the guide.

Kyouya sniffed, and then, took it.

"Is it okay?" Tamaki looked at Kyouya enviously. "I've never had an energy bar before... have you?"

"Not really..." Kyouya looked black. "I've never been abandoned on the mountain so early in the morning before... have you?"

"Well, you know, Kyou-kun... in life, it's important to have new experiences... like getting up early in the morning to climb mountains!"

_**

* * *

SEVERAL HOURS LATER: **_

_**(after another dry snack of energy bars)**_

"Shiretoko Pass."

"Wow! Isn't it beautiful! Hey! Hey! What's that mountain?" Tamaki jumped up and down in excitement.

Kyouya pulled him away from the precipice and glinted his glasses towards the guide.

"Look at the guidebook - or ask our guide."

"Mount Rausa."

A gloved hand waved at a distant peak.

"The famed disputed Kunashiri Islands..."

"Hm. What a revelation," Kyouya sighed. "Even I KNEW that..."

"But isn't it beautiful!" sighed Tamaki. "The snow. The pure white snow! The landscape - it makes me feel so small! The silence!"

"It isn't silent HERE," grumped Kyouya. "If you could shut up..."

* * *

Tamaki held his tongue, until the sun started to sink, and, after driving Kyouya to a state of nervous exhaustion, managed to shift the boys' supplies to the Shadow King's shoulders. When it got so dark, that the stars began to show and the moon had risen full and round to the top of the sky, the guide threw down his pack and silently began to set up his tent. 

Looking around the boy's jaws dropped. They'd reached the top of Mr. Shiretoko!

"WE DID IT!!!! YAY! WOW! Wait till Haruhi hears of what Daddy and Mommy did! Won't our daughter be proud..."

The guide dropped his tent pole.

Kyouya adjusted his glasses.

"I apologize for my companion's apparent insanity," he said frostily to the older man. "It's what I like to call 'delayed mental maturation', as you can see."

Delayed mental maturation or not, Tamaki's praise of the landscape certainly reached new heights of prose, even for the teen. Wordsworth would have wept. Kyouya, followed Tamaki (to make sure that the air-headed teen wouldn't toss himself over the side of the cliff in enthusiasm).

_

* * *

I mean, Kyouya thought. __It's all well and good to feel as though you could fly up here... but... that doesn't mean one has the actual ability to sprout wings. Idiot._ , Kyouya thought.

* * *

Dragging the ecstatic teen back to the campsite, Kyouya followed the guide's example. Or tried to. _

* * *

Commoners know more than we give them credit for. Who knew it was so hard to put up such a seemingly easy construction as a tent? _

* * *

"You know how to put up a tent?" Tamaki asked wide-eyed. 

"Hmmm... no... but it should be easy -" Kyouya said tightly as he watched the guide out of the corner of his eye. "I got top of my class, after all. I should be able to figure out a tent..."

"Kyouya - you're so smart! You can do anything!"

"Well... no... I obviously can't stop you or the Twins from doing something idiotic - and neither can I get you to do something useful for once..."

With the guide's help (Tamaki ferreted out the food; Kyouya inspected the actual tent-making procedure), the tent was raised, the food was cooked and eaten.

"You know... we should do this at the Host Club... put up tents and all that..." Tamaki suggested, as he lay back in the snow.

Kyouya said nothing, wishing he could stand to save his ass from a frozen fate - but he was too tired to stand.

"Each of us, could have our own tent - the girls would really like having a campfire in the Music Room... and there'd be that eternal question of what's happening inside the warm darkness..."

The guide choked on his rice ball.

Kyouya sighed.

"Whatever, Tamaki. Let's get to bed. We've got a long day ahead of us."

"But what do you think?"

"It's possible," Kyouya sighed. "I'll think on it, when I can feel my nether regions once again."

As they bedded down, the two boys could hear the guide putting out the fire, muttering, "...city crazies..."

"Such impudence," huffed Kyouya. "If I could, I would fire him on the spot - AND TAMAKI - GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!!!!"

**Rest of Hokkaido nature (and the guide): ...**

_**

* * *

NEXT MORNING: **_

Tamaki was the first up - as soon as there was a splinter of light shining on the nylon tent. But he knew better than to wake Kyouya up.

The Demon Lord was legendary.

_Really... in some ways... Kyouya and Honey ARE alike. They stick close to the few friends they have. Have a dark side... And a fondness for luxury. Except, Honey isn't as smart as Kyouya... Sometimes... that guy..._

Here Tamaki smiled down at his soundly snoring friend.

_He's so loveable. _

_In his own way. Of course._

_**

* * *

TEN MINUTES LATER: **_

"Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!"

"Whaaaattttt..." growled Kyouya, his eyes flashing blearily, as he groped for his glasses. "You better have a good excuse for waking me up this early in the morning..."

Clock: 9:37 AM.

"He - he - he - he - he -"

"Make sense, Tamaki. I'm giving you 5 seconds."

"He's gone!" gasped out Tamaki.

Kyouya's glasses flashed.

"Give me five minutes."

_**

* * *

FIVE MINUTES LATER: **_

Kyouya joined Tamaki outside - looking rather fat with all of his clothes on at the same time.

His hot breath fogged up his cold glasses instantly -

_

* * *

Great. Here we go. Again. _

* * *

But that didn't obstruct the fact that Tamaki, for once, was - SADLY - right. 

Hell broke loose.

Mount Shiretoko rocked.

* * *

"Well..." Kyouya adjusted his glasses after freezing the air space around them with intense hatred and swearing. "I feel better now." 

"Oh? Really?" whimpered Tamaki, as he unfolded himself from his melancholy fetal position. "How? We're stuck..."

"No. Not really. We're screwed. Yes. But this just gives me a reason to sue the asses of everybody and anybody who were remotely connected to this misadventure... the Twins, the guide, Honey-senpai - Mori - Haruhi... I don't care..."

Tamaki started to cry.

"WAAAHHH!!! I just wanted you to be happy!"

Kyouya glared down at his companion.

"It WAS YOUR IDEA after ALL?!!!"

"Uh... well.. I just wanted..."

"You lied to me!"

"I thought you'd say no to coming -"

"Damn right..."

"So I asked the Twins and they suggested this way - so - so -"

Tamaki's blue eyes pooled with tears.

"Tch." Kyouya's eyes flashed red (aka Demon Lord). "And stop pretending to cry!"

"I'm not pretending!"

Kyouya drooped with a sigh.

_

* * *

No... The idiot probably meant well... _

* * *

He turned away to look over the large landscape - now bright under the sun - clear as crystal, the snow sparkled on the ground. As far as the eye could see, on his left, the frozen shores melted away into the ever changeable ocean. And somewhere in the distance, the shores of Kunashiri Islands. To his right, lay the rest of the National Park they had been abandoned in. 

The nearest city lay weeks away (traveling by foot, that is), Monbetsu - nothing more than a glitter of metal in the lush valleys of the Abashiri-shicho. And closer... the spas, which looked busy with black specks moving about...

_

* * *

Yes. _

_We are on the top of the world._

_And he's right - it's like I CAN fly... how lame... huh..._

* * *

Kyouya jolted out of his reverie at the sound of Tamaki's sigh. 

"I thought, you'd enjoy this - it's so like you..."

"Tamaki... you're lame..."

"I know, I know, it's corny, right?"

"You could say that again... but... only to be expected from you."

"You're cruel."

"Stop crying. It won't work with me."

A silence.

"You don't seem mad," Tamaki pointed out tentatively. "Maybe you don't mind?"  
Kyouya sighed.

"No..."

He paused.

This was a big concession...

"No. I guess not. I don't mind. I should thank you probably..."

"Eh?"

"Lately, I guess, I've been letting myself get too frazzled what with, you know... school and stocks and the Host Club..."

"Yeah..."

"You don't have to agree with me..."

"Sorry. I was just worried. And I thought - well, it would be like old times - when it was just the two of us. Together. Alone. Like the time when you took me to Kyoto and I drove you nuts with all these dumb requests..."

"Yeah... I remember those times. A nightmare I thought I'd forgotten..."

"Really? I see those times as golden."

"How cliched."

"Ahh..."

Tamaki rose, and together, they stood there - Tamaki's hand creeping into Kyouya's hand. In the silence, the landscape was so romantic and ephemeral and seemed to be a sort of fountain for beautiful thoughts - the sea - the snow - the empty, clear sky - the lazy clouds and the stark naked trees. Tamaki felt his heart swell...

_

* * *

Ah! My Christmas dream come true! Hokkaido and Kyouya together! At one time! _

* * *

Kyouya said nothing, his face a careful blanket slate, hiding his inner turmoil. _

* * *

What the hell is he grabbing my hand for... This is so sudden... I bet he's got something perverted up his sleeve... how long has this been going on for, I wonder? I should have noticed this. I should have - _

_But you didn't_, another part of him chided. _You should have but you didn't - because, once again you got caught up in other THINGS. Or perhaps..._

_I knew all along... _

* * *

Kyouya realized as Tamaki shifted his fingers to grip Kyouya's hand more firmly. _

* * *

I knew all along and - I was trying to run away. Because... to feel this is... It means that I've got something to lose - something to lose too close to my heart. But... it's a risk... _

* * *

"Life is a risk," Kyouya asked into the cold air. 

"Yeah," Tamaki smiled. "Everything's a risk, you could say. But you shouldn't think that way, Kyouya. Things like this -" He held up his hand. "Things like this are - something we should treasure forever. Right?"

"That's what you dragged me up this mountain for? To tell me that?"

Tamaki shrugged.

"I like doing things in style."

"You could have done it at the Eiffel Tower - or somewhere more -"

"No, idiot. Loveable idiot -"

"I'm NOT a lo - lo -"

"Say it!" egged on Tamaki as Kyouya blushed.

"I"m not a loveable idiot!" Kyouya frowned. "Certainly not the IDIOT part!"

"But loveable..." Tamaki's blue eyes twinkled.

"Uhhh..." Kyouya turned away sharply, hiding a small blush. "YOU'RE the idiot."

"Well... You need something special. Something that suits you - something that shows, I don't know, the breadth of your character."

"Tamaki... who told you say that? Let me guess, Haruhi..."

"Eh heh heh... I had help from everybody - because, you know, they all understand."

Kyouya's ears turned red.

"Everybody knew? I should have sniffed out this nefarious plot long ago... Now I feel like an idiot."

"You do? Sorry! Kyouya! I'm sooo sorry! I didn't want you to feel like that!"

"Whatever. Let's go down."

"No. Let's just stay here for a while..."

"... fine..."

Kyouya didn't know what to think. He stood there, trying to juggle all these new revelations in his head, all the new feelings that poured out from the inside. All those messy things he had tried to regulate - love, peace, joy, hatred (_Hikaru... Kaoru... damn you..._) - and, to feel them well up, with the cold sharp wind and warm rays of the sun -

"Kyouya..." Tamaki's voice whispered, as the blonde-haired teen turned slowly towards his quiet companion. "Forgive me... but..."

The landscape of snow, sky and sea disappeared as Tamaki's eyes moved into his fogged up vision. Kyouya prided himself on his determination.

_Once I set my hand to a plow, I'll never turn away from it. And this friendship is no different._

So he didn't move as warm, strong arms made their way around the small of his back - and as Tamaki leaned in, his hot breath meeting Kyouya's in a soft gentle kiss.

* * *

Mount Shiretoko rocked. _**

* * *

LATE AFTERNOON THAT DAY: **_

Tired and exhausted, Tamaki and Kyouya collapsed in the front foyer of the Shiretoko-Iwaobetsu Youth Hostel. Caked in mud and snow, stinking of sweat (and blood and tears), the two boys were barely recognizable. After two hours of sleep and a long, hot bath, Kyouya and Tamaki looked marginally representable. Downstairs, they were greeted with cheers and applause.

"The only two kids to survive a night on the mountain in the dead of winter!" yelled one of the young men.

"Those Tokyo people are crazy..." muttered another.

"But they are so cute!" squealed a hot girl who had found a way to drape herself over Tamaki (to Kyouya's great annoyance). "And strong - to survive that trip!"

"Princess..." Tamaki (here he gave Kyouya an innocent glance) leaned in toward the girl. "Knowing you were here waiting, made the journey, that much more easier..."

"KAAAWWWWAAAIII!!!"

"Aren't they just too perfect!"

"Here! Have a drink!"

"Have you made a trip to the onsen yet? You should!"

"Hey! Let us take you!"

"We'll go too!"

_**

* * *

THAT NIGHT: **_

Tamaki snuggled close to Kyouya savoring his friend's warmth, while giving little love pecks down his neck and across his shoulders.

"You want something?" asked Kyouya.

"Something..." Tamaki smiled suggestively into his friends back, while his hands traveled south in their explorations. "I've always been wanting to do a little bit of this and that... to Mommy... to make her feel.. that much more special."

"Her? Excuse me - but -"

"Never mind... just joking..."

A silence.

"So... you really did plan this from the start?"

"Sort of... with Kaoru and Haruhi's help."

Kyouya sighed, then shrugged.

"Well... I guess since they are imagining us to be enjoying ourselves, we might as well take this opportunity. I'm never one to give up something freely given..."

"That's my Kyou-kun!"

"And I'm NOT YOURS!"

"Hmmm..." Tamaki drew back from another long kiss, where Kyouya tried (unsuccessfully) to turn the tables. "You think you can win against a Frenchman in love?"

That night, Mount Shiretoko REALLY rocked.

**

* * *

**

OWARI

_**

* * *

**_

Or not...

Epilogue:

_**TWO WEEKS LATER:**_

Kyouya looked definitely better for the trip - he was humming, and swaying a little as he bent over his laptop.

Tamaki definitely smiled too much these days - the expression of a cat who got ALL the cream...

Haruhi could only shake her head.

_

* * *

It's too good to be true - it's scary... something bad's about to happen. _

* * *

"Something good came up?" asked Honey (bravely, in Haruhi's opinion). 

"Oh yes..." Kyouya smiled (truly... something frightening). "I just got a word from my lawyers."

"Uhhh..."

Everyone turned around.

"And?" Tamaki sighed. "Let me guess... you won the suit."

"Of course..." Kyouya shifted his glasses with his third finger. "I suggested the man take up his job in Switzerland. Or Norway."

"Iceland's good, too."

"Or Canada."

"The point is..." Kyouya smiled. "I feel like the season is complete. In every way possible."

"Trust revenge to make the Shadow King truly happy..." mumbled Haruhi.

"Well... at least, it wasn't YOU," pointed out Kyouya, frostily.

"You don't have bring Hokkaido indoors," muttered Hikaru, shivering from the room's sudden drop in temperature.

"I don't know," Tamaki smiled. "I kinda like the idea of keeping Hokkaido in here all the time. That place holds MANY happy memories. Many. Happy. Memories..."

Drool dripped off his chin.

"Ewww... I don't want to know," Kaoru shivered. "Do you, Haruhi?"

"Hmmm... I don't mind... Renge-chan wouldn't mind either... it would make good material for another winter doujinshi..." The tomboy smirked at the boy's shocked expressions.

Kyouya looked thoughtful.

"If it was appropriately done..."

Haruhi could just see calculations and dollar signs running through the teen's head.

_

* * *

Trust the Shadow King to use his own experiences as fodder for some new entrepreneurial scheme... _

* * *

"At any rate, Mount Shiretoko holds many fond memories for me. It will always be in my heart," the expansive Prince proclaimed. "I'll never forget the night we rocked Mount Shiretoko." 

Everybody looked appropriately awed.

"Truly... Kyouya, is... in every way... a perfect Mommy for Daddy..."

Hikaru and Mori wordlessly passed money over to Haruhi and Kaoru. Kyouya looked pissed.

"Uke, after all, huh... what a suprise," Haruhi double-checked the money with approval. "Enough for Dad and I to have some nice fatty tuna for New Years..."

Kyouya blushed and made a mental note to punish Tamaki later. His glasses flashed.

Something else was going to rock tonight...


End file.
